"The other thing is...he's much older than me."
During a session on effective feedback for managers, one of the group bravely voiced this fear - that not only was he new to management, but that the man he was supposed to manage was significantly older. So far, he'd decided to just leave him to it and not interfere too much.
This led to a great discussion about what we decide to make a problem when we manage people. It was a good humoured and honest sharing of people's "hang ups" and fears.
What was apparent, was that (as they were all new to managing people) they were fears based on very little evidence. But they played on lack of experience and confidence and became "real".
We agreed 3 things that could help in this kind of situation:
1. Check in with yourself about what evidence exists for the fear. Or have you just "made it up" ?
2. Reflect on your own experience of being managed and think about what made your managers effective - was their age or some other inherent factor particularly significant or was it their skill set and approach?
3. Ask people what support they need from you and act accordingly. Adjust as different situations demand. Check in that it's working for both of you.
